Gentrification at it's finest..

Stolen from Craigslist's "Rants and Raves" this morning..I didn't even know about Half&Half's close until right now...check it out.


Reply to: pers-469556562@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-11-05, 11:06AM CST

RIP HALF&HALF, RIP WICKER PARK.
Reply to: pers-469500308@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-11-05, 10:19AM CST

Oddly enough it seems I predicted the nigh demise of Half&Half in a gentrification battle lost to the corporate loving yuppies.
On Friday November 2, 2007 Half&Half was shut down for good and its band of cool cats were left jobless. The reasons given were shady at best, and in vintage shitty form there was no advanced notice. Local baroness, Debra Sharpe and her tax-collecting sidekick had had enough of the artistic expression, community building, and youthful disposition. No plumber was ever notified about our ancient leaky pipes and sinks, no contractor contacted for our bathroom without a ceiling, our chipped up banged up counters, no painter called for our shoddy rotting wood exterior, no buffer for our acid washed windows, no electrician for our broken ventilation system, air conditioner, basement and kitchen lighting, or refrigerators. No I suppose those handymen were busy at Goddess and Grocer, Feast, and Cru Winebar. I guess the advanced notice from you Debbie, was that you had given up on us a long time ago. A champagne product is not possible on a malt liquor budget.

---Now, before you blow your vintage/2nd hand/DIY gasket I have just a few comments and questions; First, why didn't you do the job yourselves and simply send the owner the bill or and/or take it off your rent? You can do this according to Chicago law. A quick and relatively cheap and painless call to the city, renter's rights org's, etc., would've gotten you on your way. Plus, a quick call (or threat to call) the city might've gotten your landlord off her duff as she's responsible to keep up to code while your lease is valid. Any lost business could've been recouped.

But no worries to the venti loving, stroller pushing new residents of Wicker Park; there is a Starsucks down the block and word on the street has it that a Dunkin Donuts will replace Half&Half's final resting place (Good luck getting the homeless away from there).

---I love this "new residents" stuff. How long have YOU lived in Liquor Park? Starbucks, as I understand, (but could be wrong) offers health-care to its employee's. It offers a possibility for a career that pays beyond minimum wage. I've patronized local coffee shops and experienced everything from service with a smile to its equal and opposite vibe. At Starbucks, I'm guaranteed the same service (and really, I'm just there to get coffee, I don't understand hanging out in coffee bars, I mean, where's the liquor?) Why can't Half&Half relocate? Are there no empty store-fronts? What about the vacant store next to Nick's? (formerly Dreamerz). Anyway, you get the point.

Half&Half baristas were paid Illinois State Minimum wage, manager(s) a few bucks more, and we all split tips. No benefits were offered, no pay raises structured.

Ironically enough, the last shift worked was by the two most tenured H&H employees, and the entire tip jar was stolen. (The jar itself had a history as long as Half&Half’s). When I came into work my morning shift, I was notified we were closed for good. I asked if I could grab what tips were left and I was told "I don't know about that,"
Business as usual.

Debbie Sharpe and Sister Caffeine Incorporated have a rich history of stealing from its own employees. When the register drawer came up short, the remainder was taken from not only from the front of the house tips, but also the cooks’ tips who never even touched the drawer. This practice is illegal, however our loyalties lied in each other and to our regulars, so we took the hit quietly.

---Why take it quietly? Sounds to me you're offering up your rear to your boss without even the expectation of a reach-around. This is not right. If your boss fu*%ing you in the *ss don't just stand there and take it like a man. Do something.

But oh, how it gets so much better.
When the thief amongst our ranks, ceased to stop their stealing I proposed a simple tried and true solution. There’d be two drawers; one counted out at midday and one at the end of the night with shifts scrambled around to rule out the innocent. (This is pretty standard practice). However, Debbie and Sister Caffeine Inc. had a better idea:
TO SECRETLY AND DISCRETELY TAKE MONEY OUT OF OUR PAYCHECKS.
Gently siphoned and even itemized on the paycheck’s fine print as “Advance Repayment.” This may seem a bit far-fetched, but ask any of your former Half&Half employees and they can even show you the paystub. Again, this is illegal, but our loyalties rested in each other and in our regulars so we took the hit.

---I have to say, I'm confused as to the link between your regulars and your thieving bosses. Do your regulars sup with the gentry? If not, I would think your regulars would be on your side and send up a hearty HUZZAH! in your attempts to get whats rightfully yours. Are they loyal back to you, or merely grabbing a cup o' joe somewhere thats NOT Starfucks? Again, if your partner demands satisfaction and never reciprocates, its time to get a new partner.

The bitterness is still fresh within our mouths, like a misbrewed pot of Black Cat. What soured me particularly was the most inhuman of our mistreatments: We were not given time to say goodbye to the seemingly listless list of regulars we genuinely cared for. Few understand the intricacies of a compassionate barista's relationship with customers they regularly serve. I can only speak from my point of view, but I can safely say that I only hired and trained people who intrinsically portrayed these values of love for humanity.

I make coffee. Some people hear my profession and they scoff(ee). Yeah I could make a lot of money throwing my bottles around if they were labeled Stoli or Jameson instead of Monin or Torani. I’ve been offered bar tending jobs, but that’s never what it was about.
The moment I begin to open my mouth to ask you how are you? or Can I get you started on a delicious coffee drink (“Gin&Tonic?”), the moment I make real, unmandated, human eye contact with you, the moment my teeth peek out of the side of my lips to reveal a coy smile, the moment you do too when I flip your drink and then I drop it, the moment I hand you your "chicken burrito, extra sour creme," the moment you explain to me the troubles of your mercury retrograde, the moment you wonder where that Arabic currency on the jar is from, the moment you smell Wolf arresting you for alcohol abuse "Lack of alcohol," the moment you read "life is beautiful," on the back of a constant consumerism card, the moment you walked in, the moment you walked out when I said have a good one with all my heart hoping you would have a good something. All of these moments I was a part of, genuinely with all my heart hoping to change your day.
I will not forget these moments, I will not regret the moments, and these moments are a beautiful life. Too often do we all get caught up in getting to work on time, making a deadline, catching the train, meeting up with Ryan, settling my problems with Claire, what am I wearing tonight, what am I doing tonight, who am I doing tonight etc..
Living in the moment, talking, connecting, and respecting the human being in front of you. That is real, that is what it is about, that is love.
That is how coffee was and is meant to be done.

---Funny, and here I thought coffee just woke me up a bit and kept headache's away. Good luck in future and don't bend over for anyone unless they're prepared for a little reciprocity. Love thy neighbor, love thyself.




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PostingID: 469556562